How Can I Carry On? (Motivation Issues 2018)
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How Can I Carry On? (Motivation Issues 2018)

Hello I’m Liz Zorab and this is Byther
Farm and today I want to talk about what motivates me. I’ve been asked quite a few times in the
past, and then again recently, what it is that spurs me on and motivates me to
keep on doing what I do. So I thought I would try and explore
some of those ideas with you. And I am talking off the cuff here, I wish there
was a scrip,t but there isn’t. About 20 years ago I was diagnosed with long term
depression and I’d already had it for quite a long time then, and so dealing
with depression has been with me pretty much as long as I can remember. And when
I came out of the very deepest part of my depression, I made the decision that
actually I like this life and I want to live it in the best way that I can. And
for me that means being compassionate and caring and supporting the world
around me as best I can. And that has to go hand in hand with caring for myself
and supporting myself. And I think one of the best things I did was to learn to
listen to what it is that I’m feeling and I’m thinking, and allowing myself to
think and feel those things and then, look for a positive. So every situation
that comes up, like our sink hole in the front garden, it’s been a case of I
was really scared, I was frightened, I just didn’t know what to do, I walked
around for about a week in a blind panic. And I allowed myself to feel that and then
I said ‘Okay I’ve felt all that feeling and now I need to think about the
practicalities and also I need to turn that negative situation into something
positive’ – so that I’ve got something to look forward to and something to build upon,
rather than just focusing on the big black hole in the garden. I really don’t
want to sound like a Wonder Woman, I’m absolutely not!
I am incredibly vulnerable and scared and frightened and nervous and all of
those things a lot of the time. And mostly, but not always, but mostly I
choose not to show that on the camera, but certainly they happen. And quite
often when I’m telling you that I’m worried or I’m scared I’m smiling about
it and some of that is out of embarrassment because I find it a bit
embarrassing that I don’t cope with everything. But I also know I’m not
superhuman and I absolutely can’t deal with everything all the time. But often,
by the time I’m smiling about it, it’s because I’ve allowed myself to feel
those things, I’ve recognized what I’m feeling and I know I’m moving through it
and that I will, one way or another, mentally turn the situation around
into something that is dealable with, I’m not going to say it’s always really
positive, but I I can cope with it. So that’s how I deal with things, that’s how
I find my way through difficulties. But my motivation to keep going is probably
born out of stubbornness more than anything else. I am quite stubborn, I
don’t like to be beaten by things. I certainly don’t like to be beaten
by situations that I do have some control over. Ad I know that I don’t
have control over our natural environment, I don’t have control over
how other people behav,e but I do have control over how I react to those
situations. So the picture is there’s someone who’s a little bit stubborn,
doesn’t like to be beaten by the situation, recognizes that the only thing you’ve
got control over is yourself and I think that is probably what
motivates me most of all. And whatever I do I want to make a success of it! One of the questions I had was how do I
keep going on the homestead when things are going wrong? And I’ve thought about this
quite hard and I think it’s partly because I really like learning and I
feel like everything I do on our homestead is a learning process. I’m
learning about new animals all the time, I’m learning about animal husbandry, I’m
learning about growing our own food, I’m learning about soils. I am constantly
learning and that keeps everything fresh, it keeps it new. When there are howling gales in the dark winters evenings, it doesn’t necessarily feel like a learning
process, but as a bigger picture it certainly does. And I think Mr. J has
mentioned before, I actually need projects, I need to have projects to keep
me going, so the way that I look at the homestead is that it’s a series of
ongoing projects. So in spring, hatching eggs and raising chicks and bringing
them all into the flock, that’s one project. The annual vegetable garden is
another project, but within that there are loads small projects. Learning to grow
those individual different crops and understanding more and more how they
work and how the whole ecosystem works together and the part that I can play in
that. I find that so interesting, how can I not be motivated by it? And one of the
other questions that was how do I keep going on YouTube? How do I keep on making
daily vlogs, week after week, year after year? Well it’s only been a couple years,
but I guess that means one year after another. And I have for this autumn and
winter, for the first time, changed my video
schedule and I’m now doing three videos and a live chat a week rather than the
seven videos. What motivated me at the start to keep on making videos is very
different to now. So at the start I really felt like I had a story to tell. I
felt like we were on this new adventure and I really, really felt the need to
share it, which I guess is quite a selfish motivation. And over time it
seems that many of you are enjoying sharing with us the process of our
setting up and living on our homestead. I’ve been very fortunate and that people
have taken some time to put pen to paper or
fingertips to keypad and get in touch with me and tell me that they have been
inspired by, or motivated by, or kept buoyant by some of the things that we’re
sharing. I’m really pleased there our tales of chaos on my homestead have been
a help to other people. And I’ve found when I watch other people’s videos and
they’re struggling with the same things that I’m struggling with, and it may not
be anything major, but they might just not know the same things that I don’t
know, and as they find out it’s like ‘Okay so I’m not the only one who doesn’t know
how to do that’. I’m so pleased I’m not the only one, I don’t feel alone in my
slight stupidity. I’m not calling other people stupid, but I feel stupid when I
haven’t learnt how to do things or if someone points out something really
obvious to me and it was like ‘Why didn’t I just think of that?’ And if I can be the
conduit for people learning those things, well that’s great and it motivates me to
keep on making videos and to keep on sharing our story with you. So should
I talk about the dirty thing? The thing that no one mentions? Let’s talk about
money! Money has to be a motivation, it is what we mostly need to be able to
provide ourselves with the things that we feel we need to get on in the 21st
century, under the circumstances in which we live. I know we would love to say ‘we
don’t need money’ but reality is we do, which is why Mr. J goes out to work.
But he only works part time and so a great motivation for me, on the homestead,
to raise the animals, to grow as much fruit and veg as I can, is that that is
my financial contribution to our household. And the real truth of it is, I
don’t want to feel dependent on Mr. J for all of our income, for putting food
on our table, and heat, and lights! So the more that I can produce, the more I’m
contributing and it becomes equal balance.
And for me, that’s really important. So I am motivated to get out there, to raise
the poultry, to plant vegetables, to grow the fruit. It becomes for me, it’s a
matter of feeling of balance within our relationship and not just that
aren’t I doing well out there, it’s much more deep-rooted than that. It’s about a
feeling of value and self-worth and contributing. And similarly, making the
videos has given me a small income and it really is quite a small income, but it
means that if I want some new underwear or a new t-shirt, I don’t actually
have to ask Mr. J to pay for them for me – I can buy those things for myself. And
that’s important, that’s important my sense of self-worth. So it seems that
what motivates me it’s not an acquisition of things and stuff, it’s a
way of fulfilling some very, very basic and deep-rooted needs. And meeting those
needs and insecurities with a positive impact, not only on myself, but on the
community and the wider environment. I’m happy with that.
That seems not bad way to be. So what was the point of all this ramble? Well, it was
to get some thoughts straight in my head, to share some ideas with you and also to
offer some encouragement to be brave and to have a think about what it is that
motivates you, and to enjoy every moment of that. And so, wherever you are in the
world and whatever you’ve got planned for today I hope it’s good one. And I
also hope you’ll join me again next time!

About Gregory Ralls

Read All Posts By Gregory Ralls

95 thoughts on “How Can I Carry On? (Motivation Issues 2018)

  1. You have a really good way of dealing with these issues. Sounds like my depression counselor in our regular monthly group. There we discuss issues & strategies for getting through on a daily basis.

  2. You are a treasure!! Liz, would you be able to do some recipe/cooking videos please? I would really appreciate it. ( old Brummie living in Canada. 🙂 )

  3. Thank you for stating the obvious but something most people don't realize: that our train of thought, beliefs, opinions, are really the only things we have control over to change. Everything else we learn to avoid, manage, prepare for, & have options to deal with them since we have no control over nature or others. Meditation is what works for me, & that just involves doing something repetitive or something I can zone out doing & just concentrate on my breathing. Gardening is one of those things. Thank you for sharing Liz

  4. Thanks so much for sharing those thoughts.. really resonated with me as I've experienced long term depression too… thankfully my personal strategies keep it at bay now, but motivation is sometimes a struggle…like you said, sharing is beneficial in that we realise we're not alone in feeling those emotions. Many thanks, a lovely heartwarming video 🤗R.

  5. Liz you have just hit the nail on the head, i completely agree and can empathise with you. iv been saying all this to those that live here for some time. part of this journey for me is that i have some selfworth. WE were living on the outskirts of the city before coming here and i had no reason to continue, no niche. Here i have lots although im wondering what i can and will be doing until spring when i can get outside and grow grow grow. As iv said before i suffer from depression and Fibromyalgia/cronic fatigue syndrom but like you i am stubborn and wont give in to it all. You are amazing and will continue to be im sure. Stay strong and continue, i know you will xxxxx

  6. Oh Liz – depression and anxiety have dogged me right through my adult life and even though I have strategies in place it can sometimes just creep up and bite you on the behind. On a positive though it does make you more empathetic as a person and actually able to value the more important things in life. Sometimes! I'm currently dealing with a situation that has hit all the anxiety buttons but am trying very hard not to let it beat me down – motivation at times like this can be difficult but yes projects, chores, anything that can interrupt the train of thought can be so helpful. Thank you for sharing this Liz – I'm sure there are a lot more people out there who feel the same. Take care x

  7. Good video as always Liz. It is a blessing when people are prepared to say ‘it is OK not to be OK’ and to share strategies for managing those thoughts and keep on moving forward through life. 👍😊🌺

  8. An inspiring video thank you. My favorite saying “it is what it is” then I put it behind and move on with a smile. Just think of all your accomplishments. I am retire and live on social security it is not much but enough. In live I have found if I share what I have with others it comes back three fold whether it is help, friendship or sustenance.

  9. you are not alone, liz. theres a lot of us have to battle one obstacle or another. we are still human……………..brian

  10. As a fellow person with long term depression and Hashimotos this video was so inspiring to me. Thank you Liz. I often am hard on myself that when I am down that I have no reason to feel that way I tend to beat myself up. I need to be more forgiving to myself.

  11. Relating to many of your issues, but giving you a gold star for your ability to share your innermost feelings on many subjects! I’m sure you were probably on some type of meds for your depression as I was, too. I was on Venlafaxine for almost three years, but decided I wanted off of what I heard a very, somewhat addicting med for all sorts of things plus depression. I stopped it “cold turkey” a week ago. The road after has been filled with many hard spots and detoxing after any drug will be different for everyone. Staying strong and staying busy is the key! I wanted my mind back also. So I’m sending you my inspiring and motivating bright wishes that you keep smiling always!

  12. My brain sometimes just does not positive thoughts. It is hard to look on the bright side of everything. I read a good book to keep from thinking so much.

  13. Oh so good! Liz! You are such an inspiration! Depression has touched my family multiple ways…myself not the least! Just a beautiful video!

  14. Liz you have been a hugh motivation and inspiration over the last months since I found your channel, you are a fabulous person and I look forward to watching your vlogs👍👍👍👍

  15. Liz,
    I guess you are a mind reader and knew some fellow homesteaders needed a pep talk! I have had depression for about 18 years ( I am 35) and I also have severe panic attacks. My medication is losing effectiveness and I have been struggling to appreciate some things that used to come so easily. Part of my reasoning for homesteading is because I want to save my husband money on the grocery bill and provide more so he doesnt have to go to work for 6 days a week. I work 5 days but he makes alot more money so I feel like I may be evening things out. I think we have a hard time appreciating ourselves at times but I just want to say I appreciate all of your videos and motiviation! ~ Jenn

  16. The way you deal with things sounds so much like me. I used to be the major wage earner but had nearly no time for all I do now. My job now has no income but it means we spend less on life that all comes from Lurch's job income. We have a nearly zero clothing budget as my hobby is making things, our shopping bills are very low as I make everything from scratch and preserve a lot I also buy in bulk when I can and grow what I can.This means we still have a bit of money left to enjoy ourselves. I miss my old working life but at the same time I love my new life. You learn a lot from bad things and mistakes so if at first you see no positive there is always the learning experience.

  17. Thank you for this Liz. I too suffer from depression and have been going through a particularly tough time of late. Your insights have helped. Take care.

  18. Love you (and Mr J) and this video. This has been a lousy week…said good bye to my 13+ year old black lab Thursday night/Wednesday morning. Just listening to you and your journey made me smile.

  19. very good. As you say it is to give us a sense of achievement, self worth and pride in being able to sustain and keep ourselves happy and independent. Looking forward to more of you two

  20. Hey Liz. Thanks for this. I was diagnosed with depression after the birth of my first child almost 10 years ago, but after counselling I was told that it had probably been there for a long time prior (based on my behaviours and obsessions). It's been a long process for me, but I deal with it in similar ways to yourself. I need a project and I need to be learning new skills all the time. It's not always sunshine and roses. I find myself overwhelmed sometimes. But I have developed coping strategies and I have a great GP. And like you, I have my Mr J (Dan), who has always been incredibly supportive. He made it possible for me to leave a career that wasn't helping my mental health, and in turn I do my utmost to contribute to the family. Thanks again for sharing. Lots of love x

  21. Hi Liz I know depression I know I laugh about with Val , but life not always been so good I had two mentally retarded sisters one of which has since left us and I've gone into the dark place when things have been said about them or my family , I was once in Facebook but got so many horrible messages that made me quite upset that I took it down and vowed never to go back ,
    But like you growing and being outside particularly on my plots has been a god send,
    And my children's little ones kept saying grandad please do YouTube and let us see what you do when we can't see you , and it has given me something I can give back to them . all the very best Bill and val

  22. So timely Liz, thank you so much for sharing from the heart today. I’m struggling right now so much trying to get things done while simultaneously feeling so frustrated at my lack of progress. This was helpful.

  23. You are Wonder Woman to me Liz! This is a wonderful video and it meant a great deal to me; and apparently a lot of other people who have watched as well. I thank you for that, and I thank you for sharing! Take care!

  24. Wow! I have had some of the same struggles, especially with depression. I must definitely train myself to be positive…but it is not a bad thing. It sure is better than feeling sorry for myself! Thanks so much for this video!😏🙂🙂🙃

  25. Wow! This is why I'm doing my projects! My therapist encouraged me but then I found your site. Thank you for sharing.

  26. Hi Liz , that was very inspirational. We all need motivation to live our lives. Hopefully sharing our experiences on YouTube helps us all in some way and helps give us some feelings of self worth. Thanks for sharing how you feel and take care. Nick

  27. It's like my thoughts coming out of your mouth! I really feel a lot like you. Life isn't Always easy… But there is Always a project to crack on 😉
    Stay as you are. You are wonderful.
    Love your videos. Thanks!

  28. there is no words for this video..i so enjoyed this makes you think about your life ahead of you instead of behind you…thank you so much Liz..keep smiling

  29. Oh my goodness Liz, can I say ‘Me Too’. I also gave up paid employment for health reasons and decided to turn our yard into an urban homestead so that I too could feel that I was making a contribution and not solely relying on my husband. I totally get what you’re saying about self worth. When I look at our dinner plate each night and see the bulk of it has come from our yard I’m like ‘Yes’. Keep on keeping on Liz, you’re a legend. Oh and Mr J is pretty cool too. 🙋🏻❤️

  30. Thank you Liz, an inspirational video. It is so much more effective when it is delivered by a real person rather than some impersonal professional. I have had a great deal of theft and vandalism in the 32 years we have been here, but I remember my Grandad, born in 1871 and lived a very hard life but one of his favourite songs was 'keep right on to the end of the road….'.

  31. Cami here – Yes, my name has a change as I have been motivated to try learning about making YouTube videos so I can keep track of my little garden's progress through the next year or so. It's difficult for me, as I am shy and I too have depression (especially in the winter months) But, I'm trying to be brave, and I appreciate all that you share Liz! You are an encourager. I have lots to learn, but just like you, learning new things helps brighten my days.

  32. Yes I know where you're coming from Liz as I also have long term depression and I have been fortunate enough to be helped by a lovely project in Cardiff that allows me to garden and learn how to keep on an even keel I have got an allotment and I love it

  33. Liz you are the wises woman i know, you have helped me in many ways when you talk about your depression i know all about it i have cancer, kidney problems and high blood pressure in order to enjoy my life its watching your videos and to garden,., Thank you dear liz.,

  34. You do a great job Jo. It is hard , hard physical hard mental . You just keep being you because you bring joy to many people . Much love sweety xoxo

  35. It's nice to know that we're not alone. Thank you for sharing, I think your an amazing person for open up like you did.

  36. I don't think I'm alone in saying you are a Joy and inspiration for all of us fellow struggles and tryers who tune in to you Liz…
    You are a total star my lovely… let the good times roll mate…
    Love and thanks to you from all the Murphinda Clan.
    XXX 😉
    Guru M

  37. OMG rambles are back yay! I really needed this today, struggling with motivation myself a lot lately, so thanks Liz you've given me some food for thought and maybe a different way of looking at things. Thanks so much for sharing.

  38. Thanks for sharing Liz. Your certainly in good company here, I know what you mean about accepting the good days and the bad days and rolling with it. I think the physical and mental exercise we get from working outside, being with nature and growing our food is a fundamental need for many of us. There is nothing more grounding than having your hands in the earth with plenty of muck and mud! Oh, I had a go at the apple cider vinegar but it tasted so good, I drank it before it got chance to turn to vinegar…it popped the cork right over the other side of the room…ooh good stuff, so now I’m making a second batch. I’ll try and leave it alone this time! . My son and his new wife tried it and were very impressed so they are now making some too! This morning I put together a jar of ‘fire cider’ from roots and refuge farm…sounds lethal!

  39. Thanks for the motivation Liz. I don't really struggle with it normally, but since hubby died 2 months' ago, there are things that I took for granted that he did and now find that I need to do. Little things like storing the hosepipe for winter in the shed. Because I'm only just getting fit enough now after a number of years of ill health, to tackle things again. So my next job is putting away the hosepipe 😀 Then I have to find all his power tools so I can do stuff myself, (don't worry, I used power tools some years ago) being 70-years-old is a BIT of a barrier, but I'm up for this challenge… so thanks for reminding me of all the things I can still do.

  40. Hi Liz, you are a wonderful woman to be so open about having problems with mental health as it is so much in hiding here in the UK. I had a burnout working in the NHS with useless managers. Therefore I haven been working as a locum for the last 8 years. But all the traveling and not having a social live has made me realise that i can also work occasionally and grow my own veg to get free food. Have you done a course of CBT? I found it helpful as it made me realise that i was not worthless. You keep the videos coming as you inspire me. Eveline.

  41. Hi liz, I just love your outlook on life! You’re such an inspiration, it’s so easy to just sit back and feel sorry for yourself but you are the kind of person who looks at situations and finds a positive in them, truth be told we’re all scared or anxious about something at some point in our lives but what makes the difference is how we deal with them and how we allow them to impact on our life, you’re doing just great girl and should be proud of the way you overcome the dips and embrace the highs, life is peaks and troughs for the most part for most folks. By the way have you ever thought about becoming a councillor? all good councillors speak from experience and it’s so good to hear someone speaking so eloquently and honestly about their experiences and that it in no small way makes you feel less alone and stupid, thank you x

  42. I have suffered from depression in the past so I can certainly sympathize. I find that just being in the garden and getting my hands dirty, breathing the fresh air certainly helps my overall mood. Mine is very under control and I am doing my best everyday to enjoy life. Anyway, just wanted you to know you are not alone. We all love you and your channel. It provides inspiration to me to keep trying new things in my garden. Thanks again for referring me to Rain Country. I have subscribed and find that she does a lot of different things with Calendula. I got so enthused that I bought three six packs of the beautiful yellow flowers and planted them throughout my garden the other day. Can't wait to try some of her recipes. Also, I am getting inspired to try some of her other herbal concoctions. Anyway, keep up the good work and keep your chin up always.

  43. Wow! For an ‘off the cuff’ talk, you were amazingly focused and articulate. When I make off the cuff remarks I usually end up falling down a rabbit hole and end up far from where I started! Thank you for being so open and honest; you’re an inspiration and a source of enjoyment in my day.

  44. Ive never been diagnosed, but pretty sure I have some issues. I haven't sought help because like you I'm embarrassed. I have a wonderful hubby who also said I need projects. I work more on crafts but would love a small holding. Thanks for sharing xx

  45. Beautiful, thoughtful, lovely words! Dealing with depression can be such a dark lonely struggle, but girlie, I'm pretty sure you're going to be just fine! 😉 Bless you!!! Thank you for sharing Liz 🙂

  46. You sound like you have your head on straight. You have open up some new ideas for me and given me some new things to think about. I am going to watch this video a few more times to get the benefit of your wisdom. I feel like I have made a friend in you. God Bless !

  47. Thank you Liz for sharing so candidly about your depression. I really appreciate your willingness to be vulnerable in sharing this with all of us. When someone sees you, someone who does so much and seems to have this amazing wonderful lifestyle, admit that they have struggled with depression, it goes a long way to take the stigma away for others. I don’t think sharing this is “selfish” as you say but instead profoundly unselfish. ~Heather

  48. Brilliant video Liz, thanks for sharing. I too suffer from bouts of depression, and that's the first time I've admited that, and like you have realised that I need to be motivated throughout the day in order to stay on an even keel. Winter is the worst time of year for me when I can't work on my allotment because of the bad weather and I feel like I'm sinking into a pit. I have started writing lists of projects to do throughout the day that keep me motivated and make me feel like I'm achieving something, and that give me a sense of moving forward rather than just stagnating. Love to you and Mr J xx

  49. It was a beautiful ramble friend!! I will be brave and press forward! All the while taking care of me too! 🙂

  50. Thanks so much for being brave enough to share a bit of your journey and passion with us. I appreciate your friendship and encouragement.

  51. I enjoy all of your videos. And I have some of the same things you do. Depressed I have been for twenty years. I understand e everything your saying today. We will work together and keep moving forward

  52. "Be Brave!" I really needed this post today. I tend to close off and hide. To add to that, lack of money just freaks me out. It's winter here, so while we sell eggs, our produce is under a foot of snow. Meanwhile, we need snowtires to be safe on the road, and the list goes on. I just needed your words of "I've been there". Thank you!

  53. i struggle everyday to even step foot into my garden and the only thing that keeps me keeping on, is to watch my favorite channels i subscribe too and your channel is high up on the list !! 👨‍🌾🎥👌✝ #gardeningisgoforyourmentalhelth #agoraphobiaandgardening

  54. Thanks for sharing Liz, someone close to me suffers from long term depression and growing and allotment community has been a positive factor in their life. There is something wonderful, magical and cathartic about growing your own food. Take care, sending love from Arran 😊.

  55. Motivation is my fuel! I have a little channel too, if you're looking for more! Also looking for collaboration partners if you're interested.

  56. Great video Liz. If ever you fancy a visit to Llanelli, get in touch and I can show you round my smallholding. X

  57. Empathizing with you. x What motivates ME depends on the day and the moment…Yesterday it was chocolate!…today, sleep. Sometimes, the only thing that keeps me going full stop is the thought of my grandchildren. People like you and your channel keep me going on YouTube.
    Not stupid. I am winging it here on YouTube and would love to know how to make videos like yours. So keep getting motivated…x 🙂

  58. Thanks for your thoughtful insights. Having a meaningful project to provide feelings of self worth and contribution sounds like an excellent way to be. Inspirational xx

  59. very thoughtful video Liz – I am a Cognitive Behavioural Therapist working in Mental Health Services – I see people with Depression/anxiety all the time and one of the things that often seems to maintain their depressed mood is a lack of meaningful occupation – that is what my garden gives me, meaning -purpose and a sense that I am contributing and doing something worthwhile -kind regards

  60. If you are questioning be sure many others are also wanting the answer to your question, but are afraid they will look stupid if they ask it.

  61. Hello Liz. Oh my goodness, your videos really affect me in the most positive way and am usually smiling at the story being told. And, how can you not love the ducks!!! Thank you. xxx

  62. You're a brave and generous lady. Thanks for your insights and experiences and ways of dealing with the life that happens to us all. Now if you had MY garden, you would be ReALLY depressed! You are a great motivator for me.

  63. I think you’re right about feeling your feelings, accepting them, working through and beyond them without belittling yourself is the best way to deal with that deep abiding sadness. I need a number of different things going at all times. I need variety of interests. If I don’t, I begin to feel trapped and panicked. If I allow myself to change what I am doing when I want to I am able to beat back the anxiety and sadness. I realize that my life is mine to live as I want and no one else gets a say.

  64. Thanks for sharing! You’re such a truly charming person, and you have taught me so much. I always look forward to your videos and find them helpful, inspiring, and soothing. Wishing you all the best!

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